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My wee family is home after four days in town -- we decided to just hotel most of the week because I had parent/teacher conferences and two of those days were from 4-7 p.m. No one wants to drive the winding roads when it's too night-dark then leave the mountain to drive the winding roads when it's too morning-dark. *nod*

The saga of house hunting continues and it's very annoying and frustrating and challenging and mind-boggling etc and so on. We have not had what I would call a calm year, by any stretch of the imagination and there have been serious stresses and surprises that have tested fortitude beyond belief.

Still, we rise.

During the evacuation, when we didn't know if our house would burn down or if it would stay standing, a friend said she couldn't believe how well I was handling everything. "Even though," she said, "I totally have faith and trust in God, I'd be going crazy."

I didn't know what to say. I find it odd that those most Christian are often the clearest poster children about why Christianity has a reputation for harboring the most hypocritical of us. That's not to say I don't have my own deeply rooted beliefs about What Is Out There -- because I do. But it comes not from a book or a Sunday morning sermon, it comes from this deep seated sense of connection to Something Bigger Than I That Is Somewhat Aware I Exist.

But that's neither here nor there. What matters is that I believe that these trials will totally be followed by some tribulations; that suffering is just part of life and is cyclical; that while I have free will, I do believe my path is predestined in sort of "choose your own adventure" way.

I also believe energy can be positive and negative and neutral, and right now, my space is charged with more negative energy than anything else. It's time for mindfulness, candles, and a house smudge. There may be some kosher salt thrown in for good measure.


Oreos are not helpful in creating good energy and mindfulness, but this is a weekend of pity parties and poor poor mes. Monday I chase my Zen with dedication and zeal.

I'll be a Zen Zealot, yo. Namaste, motherfucker.

That last part is probably counterproductive, isn't it?



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May 2017


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